The Number One Way to Attract More Matches

Amber Lee
2 min readNov 11, 2020

I have worked in the dating and relationship industry since 1998. A lot has changed over the years. When I began my career as a matchmaker, meeting all of my clients in person meant that they had to come to my office. Now meeting my clients in person typically means meeting over Zoom. In the late 90’s and early 2000’s I would take Polaroid photos of all of my clients. The photo was more for me to remember them than to actually share with their matches. Back then, we didn’t have the technology at our fingertips to share client photos and profiles.

As matchmaking has evolved and we have incorporated technology into our process, the way that I present matches to my clients has changed. Now, with the press of a button, I can send a profile and photo via text or email. Although not all matchmakers share photos, I believe that sharing photos and allowing our clients to approve their matches is part of the reason our firm is so successful. We do all the vetting and screening, but still allow our clients to remain in the driver’s seat!

After sharing hundreds of photos of potential matches, I know the number one thing that singles can do to increase your chances of attracting the attention of a great match. It’s simple and everyone can do it. It works when you are working with a matchmaker, dating online, or meeting new people in real life. Are you ready for the secret?

SMILE! That’s it. Simply smile and you will dramatically increase a potential matches interest in you. I cannot tell you the number of times that I have presented an attractive, intelligent, high quality match to a client only to have them say they want to “pass” because the person didn’t smile in any of their photos. Both men and women are drawn to someone who smiles. When you’re not smiling, people will describe your photo as too serious, boring, uptight, or say they can’t imagine having a fun date with you.

The great thing about this simple trick is anyone can do it! It doesn’t matter how old you are, how attractive you are, or if you’re a man or a woman. A great smile changes everything! If you are dating through a matchmaking service, online site, or dating apps, update your main photo to a picture of you smiling or laughing and you will significantly increase the number of quality matches you’re attracting!

Woman smiling.
Smile to attract more matches

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Amber Lee

Amber is the CEO of Select Date Society, a luxury matchmaking firm. She is a certified matchmaker & certified coach. www.selectdatesociety.com